Different paths
by pandora1515
Summary: AU. After Kaidan Alenko lost his friend Commander Shepard for the second time, Kaidan now had to finish what he started, but he needed the help of Lieutenant John Shepard, who was Jonathan Shepard twin. After convincing him to join his crew the Lt. was driving him crazy. The lieutenant was bold, and he didn't like obeyed orders. Worst of all John wanted Kaidan in his bed.
1. Chapter 1

Kaidan entered where they had retained Shepard's brother at Alliance HQ. He talk to the guard at the door. He identified himself and entered the room. Shepard brother was looking out the window. Last night he could capture him in a delivery that he was doing at the Citadel. His name was John Shepard, he was very different from what was his brother was. Shepard was hard, but a straight man, too bad he had to die. Shepard was a great friend to him. However, his brother worked in a gangue and liked the easy life.

Jonathan died after he disassembles the collector base along with part of his crew. he only survivors, were Joker, Tali, and Garrus. Apparently, Shepard was not the same again after that Cerberus rebuilt him. He did not have much detail; Anderson told him only the basics.

"You?" John said approaching him.

Kaidan retreated putting his hands in from, "wait ..."

"No, last night you threw a ball of energy at me, and that left me unconscious I still have a fucking headache." John said angrily, standing in front of him.

"You were threatening me with a gun. Listen I have nothing against you. Anderson found out where you were, and he orders me to get you. We need your help. "Kaidan trying to explain to him before John attacked him as he did last night. Kaidan honestly still do not know how he could win the fight, if John was just as strong as his brother was.

"You need my help for what?" John cries out.

Kaidan rubs his forehead he had a headache coming. "Listen Shepard -"

"My name is John; don't confuse me with my brother."

Kaidan looked at him carefully. John was the twin brother of Jonathan Shepard. They were identical but only physical. Obviously the two were very different. "I'm not confused you, I just call you by your last name."

"Listen to me pretty face I don't care about help anyone," John said, looking into the eyes of that man. Last night between all the commotions he could not stop admiring his eyes, and realize how handsome the man was.

Kaidan shook his head." Pretty face ah. My name is Kaidan!"

"Okay Kaidan I don't want to help you I just want to get out of here," John said pointing to his chest.

"Man, what's wrong with you, you were a commander ones, why do you are acting like that? I need you to leasing to me for a moment, now I am the Commander of the Normandy, and I need you to help me. I need you to be part of my crew, and help me finish what you brother started."

"Be in a Commander, was part of my life, now I don't want anything to do with the Alliance." John said turning around.

Kaidan knew the problem he had with the Alliance because Anderson told him; apparently he got into trouble for not respecting the rules on a mission that resulted in the loss of his crew. Kaidan himself didn't want to work with him, but the man had talent as his brother had, and he was willing to work with him for the good of the galaxy.

"Don't do it for them, if not for the memory of your brother. Your brother died twice trying to save the galaxy." Kaidan said trying to make him see reason.

John hesitated for a moment, and then sat on the bed facing the floor. "Jonathan always did the right thing, he was the perfect one. Jonathan was always the favorite of my mother, and everyone's favorite, but he was cruel he was a fucking badass, but despite everything I miss the man."

"Then do it for him," Kaidan said calmly, giving counts of the bitterness in his words.

John looked at Kaidan carefully for a moment, "what relationship do you had with my brother?"

"He was my commander, and a friend, that was all."

"I heard he had a relationship with someone in his crew."

"Yes with Liara."

"The asari! I would have gone for something better," John said, looking lustfully at Kaidan.

Kaidan could not help blushing; he could not deny that he used to be in love with Jonathan. Now he only remembered him with gratitude for saving his life on Virmire, and for all that he has taught him "So you are going to help me?"

"Okay, where do we start? But I warn you I'm not my brother I have problems obeying orders."

"I know lieutenant. The Normandy is in repair for a few weeks, after that we can come back to the ship."

"Meanwhile I have to stay locked up here?"

"No. Anderson is letting you go with me; also the Alliance will not press any charges, for working with the gang with whom you worked. I have an apartment on the Citadel you can stay with me." Kaidan was still unsure of that decision, he was a very private man, and John was the opposite. John expedient was large and extended.

John got up out of bed with a smile, "well then let's go pretty face."

Kaidan only sigh, he sensed that this would be the beginning of a headache that would last for a long time.

* * *

A week later Kaidan slept quietly as the noise from the kitchen awakened him. He growled in frustration. Shepard's brother was driving him crazy. The man was incorrigible he was bold; he kept looking at him lustfully or insinuate. John watched TV late with high volume TV keeping him awake. John bothered him all the time, but the man was charming apart from everything.

Kaidan now had to lock the bathroom door when he is taking a shower because, John walked in the bathroom, to use the toilet while he was showering, and knew that John was doing on purpose. John slept naked in bed with the bedroom door open. Right now he had a desire to kill Anderson for done this to him.

He got out the bed put on pants, and headed to the kitchen meeting a disaster, "what the hell is this mess John?"

John scratched the top his head, "I wanted to make you breakfast, but ... I don't know how to cook," John said with embarrassment.

Kaidan felt sorry for him for a moment, "John why don't you wear clothes?" Kaidan asks him after look the he was wearing only his underwear and a shirt.

"What you don't like what you see Commander?" John said smiling.

"Oh my God, don't touch anything more in the kitchen, I'll go to the bathroom and be back to make breakfast, and for God's sake put on some pants." Kaidan said walking out of the kitchen.

"Kaidan wait, I need a favor from you."

Kaidan stopped walking, "I knew this attempt to making me breakfast had a price, what do you need?"

"Can you take me to see my mother? She won't answer my calls."

"I wonder why. Okay after breakfast we will go. "

"She hates me," John said bitterly.

"No mother hates their son. I will be right back. "

After a while Kaidan got back to the kitchen. John had clothes on. Kaidan couldn't deny that the man was handsome like his commander used to be, but John was much more attractive crazy as it sounds Kaidan felt attracted to him.

"You look very handsome Kaidan." John said.

"Likewise."

After cleaning the mess in the kitchen Kaidan prepares breakfast. They eat breakfasted quietly, and then left the apartment. Kaidan looks at him out of the corner of his eyes. He could see John was worried, and even though he was driving him crazy he was concerned about the men, Kaidan Alenko wasn't a bad man, on the contrary he always thought of others before himself. Once inside of the shutter Kaidan dared to ask him, "why do you think your mom hates you?"

"Her dreams were that Jonathan and I follow in her footsteps in the Alliance after I quit my mother stops talking to me. When Jonathan died the first time, she begged me to return to the Alliance, but I was already tucked deep in the bargain, and you know how hard it is to get out their possibly now looking for me. "

"That is resolved, do not worry." Anderson took care of clear his name.

"My brother was always my mother pretty boy."

"I did not see you at Shepard funeral."

"Let's say I was looking from afar."

"Now you have a chance to leave that life," Kaidan said trying to give him encouragement.

"No, I'll do this mission for my brother, but I don't want anything to do with the alliance when this is over. You, on the other hand I would like to continue seeing you."

Kaidan wisely thought for a moment how to respond. Kaidan knew Jonathan had wanted his brother to get out of that life. Kaidan would make the impossible for that to happen. "Then you'll have to continue in the Alliance, and maybe I'll give another thought."

John laughed, " you are really going to play hard to get do you?"

"I 'm hard to get I do not like adventures, and you are a very adventurous man."

"You're nice, are very different from the man I used to be. Do you have a partner? "

"Not now," Kaidan saw John, takes his hand to his cheek. "Stop. "

"I like you."

"I don't like you like that," Kaidan lied

"I do not believe you ..."

Kaidan didn't answer him, he continuous driving unable to deny himself the he likes his touch, but he couldn't forget who John was, and the truth is he didn't want to getting in trouble with someone as adventurous as John Shepard is. He already had enough with the last relationship that he had, which ended in a disaster

They arrived to the house of Hannah Shepard; John had a key, so he could open the door. It was a beautiful house. Hannah worked at the Alliance. Kaidan met her in Jonathan's funeral. Kaidan hear him call his mother, and a second later she was with them.

"John what are you doing in my house?" She asked irritated.

"Good to see you too mom," John replies sarcastically.

"The last time we spoke I told you I did not want to see you again."

Kaidan looked at Hannah without saying a word, she looked very angry, and yet her tone was bitter.

"Mom please I didn't come alone I just want to talk to you."

Hannah looked at Kaidan." I'm sorry you have to see this, but John knows I don't want to see him ever."

"Damnit mom, please-"

"No, see you cause me pain John. You make me remember my son because you are not my son, my only son died doing the right thing, but you don't know that, you only know about crime and the easy life," she said with her eyes full of tears.

"Jonathan was always your favorite, I never had a chance with you mom," John sighed, "but I just came to tell you, I'll help Commander Alenko in the same ship which my brother was Commander to finish what he started." John then looked at Kaidan. "Let's go."

"No, John let me alone with your mom."

"Kaidan."

"John, please."

"Fine, I'll be on the shutter," John said before walking out the door.

After he left Kaidan headed to Hannah. "Can you give me a few minutes of your time?" Kaidan asks her politely.

"Yes, follow me."

Kaidan followed her to the study, which looked like her office. He looked around for a moment, she had certificates on the walls in her name then he saw a picture of her with her two sons. Kaidan grabbed the picture frame. "You love John as well as you love Jonathan?"

"I do, but John disappointed me, however, Jonathan…" she could not continue.

Kaidan put the photo back, "I'm sorry for your loss, but with my help, you can get your son back. I 'm not one to get into your life, but I have a mother that I love to death. Everyone thinks I'm perfect, but I'm not-"

"So I've heard about you."

"Actually I was a restless young man, and I gave my mom a lot of headaches, with my last prank I made my mother cry many nights, but she learned to forgive me, and that made me understands what I was doing wrong, and changes my life enters to the Alliance."

"I've already given many opportunities to John. I found out that, he has issues with a dangerous gang."

"That is in the past, the thing is the now he's doing this for his brother, but after we win this threat of the reaper, John needed a reason not to come back to that life." Kaidan saw her hesitate for a moment. You could tell she was struggling with her feelings. Shepard sometimes talks to him about her. "It was what Shepard wanted. I'll make sure that he doesn't get into trouble, despite the fact that I have to admit that your son is staying with me since last week and he is driving me crazy." Kaidan saw her laugh.

"I know, my son is crazy. You don't know what you're getting into."

"Oh, I think I have a clear idea."

After that, they talked for a while. Kaidan completely forgot about John until he made his entrance into the study.

"Well, well, Kaidan I had been waiting for half an hour outside."

"I'll leave you two alone for a moment, I'll wait outside."

A while later the two came out of the house of John's mother. Kaidan could see that he was happy and that conversation with Hannah paid off. "What did you say to her? I get my mom back."

"I won't tell you let's go back to the apartment."

John put his arms around Kaidan, "You're special."

"John stops touching me," Kaidan asked him, but that the request did not sound very convincing.

"For now ..." John says.

After that things between them were much better, but John was still driving him mad. At all costs, he wanted him in bed and Kaidan was losing his willpower. That particular night Kaidan accepts his invitation to go out and have some fun. John took him to a place that he did not like it, but apparently John was accustomed to going because everybody knew him.

"John I did not like this place."

"Relax Kaidan is saved."

Kaidan saw him lighting a cigarette. "John what the hell you're doing?" Kaidan saw him stand in front of him then put his hands on the counter trapping him against it.

"Hey, pretty face you need to relax I told you, I brought you here to keep you amused for a while," John ran his finger across Kaidan's lips, "I would like to kiss your lips."

"No."

John smiled closing the distance between them, "I want to kiss you."

Kaidan put his finger in his mouth, "no!"

"I'm frustrated with you; I want you in my bed!"

"Keep dreaming Lieutenant." Kaidan said, but inside he was dying to kiss him.

John walked away laughing, "Damnit you're tough."

Kaidan grabbed the beer he was offering to him, he needed right now. He had to watch as John danced with his friends. The place is crowded, and the music was causing him headaches. After a while of being alone in the bar, he left without saying a word. When he reaches the shutter John stopped him.

"Kaidan wait."

"John go continue having fun with your friends, I'm leaving."

"I brought you, so you can have fun."

"The only one having fun is you with your friends. I'll see you in the apartment -"

"Damnit Kaidan what do you want me to do, if you reject me all the time, I'm a man I have needs, and it had been a long time since you...know I had sex."

"You are something out. Have a good time."

Kaidan leave him in the club and return to his apartment. He had drunk a lot, so he just takes off his clothes and lay down on the bed. John was free to do what he pleased. Tonight it was a reminder that John Shepard wasn't the right man for him. He remembered Shepard he would have given anything for his former commander to noticed him, but he was crazy about Liara. Gradually he was falling asleep, a few hours after he listen went John enters to his apartment, Kaidan attempt not to care, but he listen his bedroom door open.

"Kaidan -"

"Leave me alone John Shepard."

"No!"

"Dammit, you didn't have enough with the women, or the man you were tonight. Now you want to annoy me," Kaidan yelled then looked at him. John was all beaten. "What... What the hell happened to you?"

"I got in a fight because of you."

"Because of me!" Kaidan got out the bed, "Let me got get the first aid kit." Kaidan back after a few moments and one began to heal his wounds. "Okay tell me what happened."

"After you left me my mood changed. I reject someone in a bad way, and he tries to hit me, and one thing led to another," John says.

Kaidan laughed, "So you could not satisfy your needs tonight?"

"Hey, don't laugh is not funny."

"Oh it's hilarious."

"I don't know, what is happening to me with you. Kaidan, Please I want to be with you."

"NO," Kaidan finish healing the wound on his face. "Now go to bed, tomorrow we have to go to the Alliance HQ."

"Kaidan, what I have to do for you to be with me? I know you like me."

"I do, but you're not my type, you're too bold, incorrigible, plus I am your commander."

John got up rubbing his neck, "I'm just working this mission is all, Please let me stay with you tonight, and I'll be good."

Kaidan had no strength to argue with, so he allowed. He returning to his bed, and saw he begins to undress. "John-"

"Relax, I will leave my underwear on, or you want me to take it off."

"Oh Jesus Christ do whatever you want." Kaidan lay on the bed. He just listen to John mumbling something he didn't understand, then Kaidan felt John put his arm around his waist, and for a moment he had to hold his breath.

John kissed him on the cheek, "Goodnight Kaidan."

"Good night John."


	2. Chapter 2

Kaidan woke up that morning feeling something poking him from behind, and he knew, exactly, what it was. He didn't dare to move. Then Kaidan felt John's breathing started to stir in his neck. It definitely felt great. He had to remind himself, who he was now 'Commander Alenko', and who was the man who was holding him. Yes, he wanted him, but Kaidan wasn't going to make things so easy for John, not if he wanted to change the man. He owed it to Shepard.

Worst of all when he began to feel John' kissing his neck, and his hand stroking his chest making him moan. He wanted to turn around so bad, and satisfy the desire he was feeling right now, but he had to be stronger, so he quickly got up from the bed. His breathing was fast, and he almost lost control when he saw John's charming smiling at him, and in the way in which he was lowering his hand from his chest to his underwear.

Kaidan had to bit his lip looking at John's erection over his underpants, then swallow after John entered his hands inside his underwear. "I... I..." Kaidan pointed toward the door, "I'm going to the bathroom ... we got to go." Kaidan turn around fast, and started to walk toward the door, but when he was about to reach the door when John stopped him abruptly turning him around, and then caught him against the wall beside the door. "John-" He was interrupted with an intense kiss, which he could not refuse, and that kiss left him without breath.

John pulls away from him breathing hard, "You can reject me every time you want, I will be patient, because sooner or later you will be mine. Now I'll take a cold shower Commander Alenko."

After he left the bedroom Kaidan took a deep breath. "Fuck me ... God Damnit." Kaidan looked down at him, "I need a fucking cold shower too," Kaidan said with frustration.

After a while, they were ready to go with Anderson. Kaidan left his room and stared at John in his uniform. "Well, you look good in blue, like your eyes," Kaidan said smiling.

"Commander you are flirting with me?" John said smiling at him back.

"No, I'm only given you a compliment, Lieutenant. You're ready?"

"Well, let's have breakfast first. I could cook you something without making a mess."

Kaidan looked at the dishes in the kitchen counter, "Oh, Okay let's see it is taste good." After a while, Kaidan gave its approval to the food. "This is good."

"I've been watching you when you cook, so I made some notes to myself, and learned."

Kaidan look at him for a moment, "why are so helpful with me?"

"Because I liked you since I saw you, because you have behaved well with me, and you didn't judge me as the other do, and you help me get the love of my mother back."

Kaidan grabbed the dish taking it to the sink to wash them. "I have no right to judged you. We are humans we make can mistake, I can only give you some advice." Kaidan speak with sincerity, he was the kind the man who had the concept that we all could at one point of our lives making mistakes, John Shepard was not exception he ether.

"What kind of advice?"

"Do not go back to that life when this over. There are many better things you can do that don't involve the Alliance."

"Now that I have my mother again, I will not, and I will not disappoint you."

"It gives me joy to hear that. Now let's go, is a long journey from here to Vancouver. "

John approached him, "Hey, pretty face, do you liked the kiss?"

Kaidan blushed, "stop calling me like that, and let's go." Kaidan said walking by.

John stopped him grabbing his hand, "why not? If, you are very handsome, and we are not going to leave until you answer me. Did you like the kiss or not?" John said passing his tongue over his lips.

"Yes! Now let's go." Kaidan said shaking his head; he had never met anyone like him. John would not give up, and he doesn't know how much longer he could refuse him.

The ride to Vancouver was pleasant; they could talk more and know each other better. John explained to Kaidan how after what happened with his crew; he lost control of his life. How Shepard try to help him, but he walked away from all disappearing for a while. After John come back Jonathan was already commander of the Normandy, then he has to devote himself to the easy life, to survive since his mother left him in the street.

Kaidan felt sorry for him, because his life had been different. His parents gave him everything, and he never had to go through calamities, maybe the fact of being an only child help them to protect him with devotion, and because of that his mother was able to forgive his follies young naughty.

"Kaidan."

"Yes John."

"Tell me about my brother."

Kaidan talk about how hard Shepard is to be, but with him Shepard was always a good friend. Also, he confessed that he came to feel something for Jonathan, but now he only remembered him with respect, also, he told him about the relationship that he had with Liara. Kaidan felt a fear, which was that if Liara saw him, he didn't know how she would react. The last time he saw her, after the second death of Jonathan, she was very sad. Kaidan participates to John his fears.

"Well, she will have to get over because I'm only interested in you, besides I don't like asari like that."

Kaidan laughed he love the fact that John didn't hesitate to speak his mind. Also John was funny, but he had to correct him not to smoke inside the shutter. "You don't smoke Kaidan?"

"No."

"I'll teach you."

"No!"

"Hey, in the short time we have known each other, you still have not learned that argue with me won't take you anywhere."

"You are going to make my days impossible do you?"

"No, I'll make your days more enjoyable. You want to change me, and maybe you will, but not before I change you a little. "

"Oh God!"

"God will not help you ..."

Vancouver was cold their luck they had they sweater on. Immediately they entered the base they realize that there was a strange movement. Everyone was walking back and forth in a hurry. They headed for the meeting room where the receptionist asked them to wait for Anderson.

"I don't like this John I see a lot of movement."

"Me neither. What do you think is happening? "

"The reaper and we are not prepared for them."

"Hey, we will be okay."

"I don't know I wanted to train you." Kaidan said trying to teasing him.

John cross his arms around his chest, "what you're trying to say Commander Alenko?"

"Well, I beat you right away that day, and last night it seems the man hit you, yet look at you face."

"Hold on a minute, you caught me off guard that day, besides your distracted me with your eyes...and you know you pretty face, and believe me when I say that the man who hit me last night, is much worse than me." They began to laugh together.

"It's good to see that you two are getting along much better." Anderson looked at John. "I prefer not to ask what happen to you," Anderson said, referring to cut on his lip.

"Actually, he's not as bad as everybody think he is Anderson, even though he is driving me crazy."

"I'm not."

"Yes you are."

"Okay boys, I'm glad. I want to introduce you to Lieutenant James Vegas. James will be part of your crew."

"Nice to meet Lieutenant," Kaidan said.

"The pleasure is mine Commander." James looked at John. "You are -"

"Shepard brother, I'm pleased to meet you."

"I knew the Commander had a brother, but not that they were so similar," James says impressed with the resemblance to Shepard.

John cleared his throat, "well, Jonathan was my twin brother."

"I see. Well, it's a pleasure to meet you. "

"Anderson, have noticed that everyone is in such a hurry, what's happening?"

"Admiral Hackett is organizing the fleet. I guess the Alliance Command know something we do not know ... I think something big heading our way. "

"The reapers?" John asks Anderson.

"I do not know. That is why I call you. I need you all back to the Normandy immediately we need to be prepared."

"Understood," Kaidan said.

"I need you two to try to find help from the consuls we need the help of all races," Anderson explain.

"And you are going to stay here?" Kaidan asks him.

"Son, I needed here, plus I know the two of you will do a good job. John honors your brother. "

"I will Sr."

"Joker is waiting on the Normandy. Kaidan come with me for a moment; the Defense Committee wants to talk to you."

"We will wait here." John said.

After that Kaidan didn't know what happened he was talking to the defense Committee, and now he was running with Anderson toward the Normandy. The reapers made their arrival wiping out everything and everyone. He and Anderson were able escape with just a few scratches, but the defense committee were not so lucky they were all dead.

The first thing the crossed his mind was his parent, but he quickly clearing those thoughts from his mind, now he had to focus on reaching the Normandy. He knew that John and James were good because Anderson talk to John over the communicator that was a relief.

They reached a point where they had to enter a building to get to where they could find a receiver to send a signal emergency. It was hard to see the Vancouver be destroyed in this way, Kaidan could see in the sky as the Alliance's ships were destroyed. The reaper destroyed the Dreadnought too, it was hard to see and absorb.

Finally they were able to send an emergency signal, and in minutes the Normandy was in front of them. Kaidan ran toward the ship, but he already knew that Anderson would stay behind.

"Kaidan you know what you have to do."

"I promise to come back and bring of the help I can. Anderson, please take care of yourself."

"You too son."

Kaidan stared out for a while until I can't stand the scene. He could not believe this was happening, Jonathan tried to warn everyone, but no one heard him.

"Kaidan, you are okay?" John said, approaching him.

"No."

"This is Loco what shall we do now?" James asked.

"We have our orders Lieutenant," Kaidan replied moving to console.

"Kaidan," Joker spoke over the comm.

"Joker, is that you?"

"Alive and kicking. Admiral Hacker has a communication for you."

"Okay, I'll take it from here."

"Commander," Hackett speaks from the other side.

"Admiral."

"Alenko I need you to go to Mars."

"Mars! Anderson ordered me to go to the Citadel." Kaidan responded to him.

"I have Dr. Liara t 'soni over there locating a new Prothean data that can help us defeat the reapers, but the archives on Marts are not responding, I need you and your team to go there."

"Understood Admiral."

"Ok Hackett out."

Joker set course to Mart," Kaidan orders him.

"Mars! Understood we be arriving about an hour."

"This is loco," James says still a little confused.

"Why Mars? What do you think we will find over there?" John asks him.

Kaidan headed to the table where his armor was taking it in his hands, "I don't know, but if it helps us win this war. Let's go get suits up."

"I don't have an armor," John said approaching him, then he puts his hand on Kaidan's shoulder, then he looked at James." lieutenant leave us alone for a moment."

"Yes I'll go change."

Kaidan gives him Shepard's armor. "It was your brother."

"No, I... I'll look like him."

"John I don't know what to say, but you are identical, so armor or no armor there are not difference."

"You're right is just," he left out a sigh, "I never thought this could happen. I'm worried about my mother."

"I'm worry about my parents too, but we have to let our feelings behind for now. Liara is on Mars, Please be subtle with her she had been through a lot." Kaidan said. Liara had never seen Jonathan's brother, and see him now, and in those conditions can affect her.

"Okay ... I'll try to be nice."

Kaidan try to walk by his side, but he stopped him, taking his hand to Kaidan's cheek, stroking it with his thumb. "John, please no now."

"Hey, pretty face I'm with you, everything will be fine."

"Thank you ..."

* * *

Upon reaching Mars Kaidan didn't say much on the shutter, he can stop replay in his mind all those people dying in Earth. Now he understood what his Commander used to feel. Frustration, desperation, a lot of mixed feelings. He looked at John who was sitting next to him looking to the floor with his hands together. Kaidan knew in whom he was thinking.

"John-"

"My brother should be here," John said shakily.

Kaidan looks toward James, who was entertaining driving the shutter. Kaidan put his hand on his shoulder, "he's not here, but you are. You need to be strong now, show everybody that like your brother, you're strong, and you can do the right thing," Kaidan said trying to comfort him

John looked at Kaidan with eyes full of tears, "I will confess something to you. Jonathan was my hero, Kaidan, my brother ...he was..." John could not keep talking.

"Hey ... hey ..." Kaidan lifted John face to face him. " Not now, I do not want James to see you like that, Please John I need you to be strong. "

"Okay."

"Commander, we're arriving to Mars."

"Okay James," Kaidan replied.

Stepping on Mars, a storm was coming, so they had to work quickly, but they were not counting that Cerberus's agent were already on Mars, killing alliance 's troops who were on Mars.

After dealing with them they entered the elevator, but Kaidan could feel James was a little tense like he wants to say something and did not dare to do it. "James you are okay?"

James looked at John, "Why Cerberus is here?"

John approached James with his arms around his waist, "why in the hell do you think I know that?" John asks him annoying.

"Shepard-"

"No, I want him to answer me."

"Well, you were his brother, Shepard used to work with Cerberus, and I've heard that you were not doing good things, so I would not be surprised if your-"

"Hey, shut the fuck up," John said pushing him.

"John stops!"

"No, I will not allow anyone to talk bad about my brother. I don't fucking care what you think about me, but not Jonathan, you're understand me?" John said in his face.

"Man okay ... I was just saying."

"John calm down, and your James is not the men to talk about someone who is no longer with us, and can't defend himself, besides, I can assure you the John knows nothing about, why Cerberus is here."

"Okay ... Sorry."

Upon exiting the elevator, Kaidan didn't dare to talk to John he looked furious, and he didn't want to make things worse, but things got tenser when they meet with Liara. She was getting attacked by Cerberus agents within ventilation tube, but she killed them.

Kaidan immediately approached her. "Liara," Kaidan says. He was happy to see her, he give her a hug.

"Kaidan thank the gods ... you're okay."

John got out from behind the shutter he was found with the look of her. He approached them, "so you're Liara?"

Liara stared at him unable to say a word for a moment, his blue eyes filled with tears, "Shepard!" she looked at Kaidan.

"No... Liara, he's Shepard's brother his name is John."

"Nice to meet you," John said.

"Oh. I'm sorry, but ... Why'd you came here?" She said unable to take his eyes off John.

"Anderson ordered me to come; He says you know what's going on." Kaidan said.

"I do," she said, moving away from them towards the window.

"Hallelujah, answers, finally." James said.

"I discovered a plan for a protean device, one that could wipe out the reapers."

Kaidan walk toward her. "Here? On Mars? We know about the archives for decades. Why now?" Kaidan asks her a bit confused, but eager to know the reasons for Cerberus presence on Mars.

"Elimination process mixed with a little desperation. When you destroyed the alpha relay you bought us time, but then you got put under investigation, I knew I had to do something," Liara explains. She crossed her arms, "Hackett knew too, he contacts me, asking me if I could use my resources as shadow broken to find a way to stop the reapers. My search brought me here. Hackett gave me access to the archives and kept me up to date on your status. My work pays off. The archives are filled with data from an overwhelmingly amount. I think I found what I needed."

"I guess I'll believe it when I see it. Where we find this weapon?"

"It's not a weapon ... Not yet, is plans for a device, a blueprint."

"It's more than what we had one minutes ago. How we get it?"

"The archives are just across, that tramway." Liara he indicated by pointing out the window. "Assuming it to Cerberus not locked, yet."

"What they're looking for?"

"For the same reason that we are here for us, for the only reason the archives..."

"Why?" Kaidan did not understand what Cerberus wants, what were his motives this time.

"The prophets came close to destroying the reapers. They had a plan to destroy them, but they ran out of time."

"And something powerful enough to destroy the reapers ..." John began to say while he was approach them.

"Just maybe it's something that Cerberus might be interested in." Kaidan said.

"So is a race to the archives," James says.

But more agents came again. Kaidan ordered James to wait in the shutter, just in case they tried to escape. James was not too happy to obey, but he did.

They continued forward and continue fight more Cerberus agents, they arrived at one of the rooms, where they found the video of what had happened in the Archives, with scientists that they had found lying on the floor dead in the cafeteria. Dr. Eva was the cause of everything.

The tension between the three of them was tangible; Kaidan could see the sadness in Liara's eyes when she looked at John, realizing that it wasn't he the one she was looking, if not Shepard. He looks toward john for a moment, who kept his distance from her. "Liara you are okay?'

Liara looked at John, who was standing at the door. "He is identical to Jonathan Kaidan; please don't tell me the he will work with us."

Kaidan put his hand on her shoulder, "Yes he wills Liara. You knew that Jonathan had a twin brother why you look so surprised?"

"It's very different now Kaidan I lost Shepard and I still love him, and seeing his brother is like see the man I love again," she said about to burst into tears.

Kaidan felt a deep sadness for her. He knew that Liara was a strong woman, even now that she was the shadow broken so see her almost on the verge of tears was sad. "Listen, we don't have time now, but later you and I need to talk."

"Okay Kaidan."

Kaidan saw her walking ahead of them. Kaidan put his arm over John's shoulder. "This is not good John."

"She doesn't stop looking at me making me feel awkward."

"I know I'll talk to her later, let's move on."

After arriving at the archives, and find the illusive man, and have a conversation with him it turned out that Dr. Eva worked for him. She tried to escape with the information in Cerberus Shutter, but James appeared with their shutter crashing against theirs.

Kaidan and Liara had to dodge Cerberus Shutter falling to the floor. "Liara you're okay?" Kaidan said grabbing her.

"Yes Kaidan," She looked behind him. "Kaidan!"

Kaidan released her after see Doctor Eva walking out of the shutter that was on fire. Kaidan pull out his gun shooting at her, but she was still coming at him when she was going to attack him, Kaidan just saw the flash of John's body, throwing himself at her knocking her to the floor, and then firing at her leaving her body lying on the floor. Kaidan was left surprised; John was like his brother a powerful vanguard.

"Kaidan you are okay?" John said, grabbing his hand instinctively.

"Yes ... that was ..."

"Hot!"

"God does not start," Kaidan look at Liara which was looking at them with suspiciously. "James grabs that thing." Kaidan says.

A while later, after having spoken with Admiral Hackett and set direction to the Citadel, Kaidan entered his cabin with John. After, all that is happening he had a headache.

"Kaidan you don't look so good?"

"I have a headache."

"Come here."

"John pleases don't."

John ignored his words, grabbing Kaidan by the waist and pulling him towards to hugging him. "Tell me what we are going to do now?"

"Trying to convince the council to help us," Kaidan said enjoying his touch on his back. "John." Kaidan was losing his willpower; right now he needed that hug, even as a friend.

"Relax, you're very tense, why do not you lie down for a while as we reach the Citadel."

Kaidan lifted his head staring at him, unavoidably, he joined his lips to John's, kissing him intensely then a noise interrupted him making he brock the kiss and looked toward the door, seeing Liara standing at the door with her eyes filled with tears looking at them.

"I see," she said before turning around.

"Shit ... Liara wait ..."


	3. Chapter 3

Kaidan entered where they had retained Shepard's brother at Alliance HQ. He talk to the guard at the door. He identified himself and entered the room. Shepard brother was looking out the window. Last night he could capture him in a delivery that he was doing at the Citadel. His name was John Shepard, he was very different from what was his brother was. Shepard was hard, but a straight man, too bad he had to die. Shepard was a great friend to him. However, his brother worked in a gangue and liked the easy life.

Jonathan died after he disassembles the collector base along with part of his crew. he only survivors, were Joker, Tali, and Garrus. Apparently, Shepard was not the same again after that Cerberus rebuilt him. He did not have much detail; Anderson told him only the basics.

"You?" John said approaching him.

Kaidan retreated putting his hands in from, "wait ..."

"No, last night you threw a ball of energy at me, and that left me unconscious I still have a fucking headache." John said angrily, standing in front of him.

"You were threatening me with a gun. Listen I have nothing against you. Anderson found out where you were, and he orders me to get you. We need your help. "Kaidan trying to explain to him before John attacked him as he did last night. Kaidan honestly still do not know how he could win the fight, if John was just as strong as his brother was.

"You need my help for what?" John cries out.

Kaidan rubs his forehead he had a headache coming. "Listen Shepard -"

"My name is John; don't confuse me with my brother."

Kaidan looked at him carefully. John was the twin brother of Jonathan Shepard. They were identical but only physical. Obviously the two were very different. "I'm not confused you, I just call you by your last name."

"Listen to me pretty face I don't care about help anyone," John said, looking into the eyes of that man. Last night between all the commotions he could not stop admiring his eyes, and realize how handsome the man was.

Kaidan shook his head." Pretty face ah. My name is Kaidan!"

"Okay Kaidan I don't want to help you I just want to get out of here," John said pointing to his chest.

"Man, what's wrong with you, you were a commander ones, why do you are acting like that? I need you to leasing to me for a moment, now I am the Commander of the Normandy, and I need you to help me. I need you to be part of my crew, and help me finish what you brother started."

"Be in a Commander, was part of my life, now I don't want anything to do with the Alliance." John said turning around.

Kaidan knew the problem he had with the Alliance because Anderson told him; apparently he got into trouble for not respecting the rules on a mission that resulted in the loss of his crew. Kaidan himself didn't want to work with him, but the man had talent as his brother had, and he was willing to work with him for the good of the galaxy.

"Don't do it for them, if not for the memory of your brother. Your brother died twice trying to save the galaxy." Kaidan said trying to make him see reason.

John hesitated for a moment, and then sat on the bed facing the floor. "Jonathan always did the right thing, he was the perfect one. Jonathan was always the favorite of my mother, and everyone's favorite, but he was cruel he was a fucking badass, but despite everything I miss the man."

"Then do it for him," Kaidan said calmly, giving counts of the bitterness in his words.

John looked at Kaidan carefully for a moment, "what relationship do you had with my brother?"

"He was my commander, and a friend, that was all."

"I heard he had a relationship with someone in his crew."

"Yes with Liara."

"The asari! I would have gone for something better," John said, looking lustfully at Kaidan.

Kaidan could not help blushing; he could not deny that he used to be in love with Jonathan. Now he only remembered him with gratitude for saving his life on Virmire, and for all that he has taught him "So you are going to help me?"

"Okay, where do we start? But I warn you I'm not my brother I have problems obeying orders."

"I know lieutenant. The Normandy is in repair for a few weeks, after that we can come back to the ship."

"Meanwhile I have to stay locked up here?"

"No. Anderson is letting you go with me; also the Alliance will not press any charges, for working with the gang with whom you worked. I have an apartment on the Citadel you can stay with me." Kaidan was still unsure of that decision, he was a very private man, and John was the opposite. John expedient was large and extended.

John got up out of bed with a smile, "well then let's go pretty face."

Kaidan only sigh, he sensed that this would be the beginning of a headache that would last for a long time.

* * *

A week later Kaidan slept quietly as the noise from the kitchen awakened him. He growled in frustration. Shepard's brother was driving him crazy. The man was incorrigible he was bold; he kept looking at him lustfully or insinuate. John watched TV late with high volume TV keeping him awake. John bothered him all the time, but the man was charming apart from everything.

Kaidan now had to lock the bathroom door when he is taking a shower because, John walked in the bathroom, to use the toilet while he was showering, and knew that John was doing on purpose. John slept naked in bed with the bedroom door open. Right now he had a desire to kill Anderson for done this to him.

He got out the bed put on pants, and headed to the kitchen meeting a disaster, "what the hell is this mess John?"

John scratched the top his head, "I wanted to make you breakfast, but ... I don't know how to cook," John said with embarrassment.

Kaidan felt sorry for him for a moment, "John why don't you wear clothes?" Kaidan asks him after look the he was wearing only his underwear and a shirt.

"What you don't like what you see Commander?" John said smiling.

"Oh my God, don't touch anything more in the kitchen, I'll go to the bathroom and be back to make breakfast, and for God's sake put on some pants." Kaidan said walking out of the kitchen.

"Kaidan wait, I need a favor from you."

Kaidan stopped walking, "I knew this attempt to making me breakfast had a price, what do you need?"

"Can you take me to see my mother? She won't answer my calls."

"I wonder why. Okay after breakfast we will go. "

"She hates me," John said bitterly.

"No mother hates their son. I will be right back. "

After a while Kaidan got back to the kitchen. John had clothes on. Kaidan couldn't deny that the man was handsome like his commander used to be, but John was much more attractive crazy as it sounds Kaidan felt attracted to him.

"You look very handsome Kaidan." John said.

"Likewise."

After cleaning the mess in the kitchen Kaidan prepares breakfast. They eat breakfasted quietly, and then left the apartment. Kaidan looks at him out of the corner of his eyes. He could see John was worried, and even though he was driving him crazy he was concerned about the men, Kaidan Alenko wasn't a bad man, on the contrary he always thought of others before himself. Once inside of the shutter Kaidan dared to ask him, "why do you think your mom hates you?"

"Her dreams were that Jonathan and I follow in her footsteps in the Alliance after I quit my mother stops talking to me. When Jonathan died the first time, she begged me to return to the Alliance, but I was already tucked deep in the bargain, and you know how hard it is to get out their possibly now looking for me. "

"That is resolved, do not worry." Anderson took care of clear his name.

"My brother was always my mother pretty boy."

"I did not see you at Shepard funeral."

"Let's say I was looking from afar."

"Now you have a chance to leave that life," Kaidan said trying to give him encouragement.

"No, I'll do this mission for my brother, but I don't want anything to do with the alliance when this is over. You, on the other hand I would like to continue seeing you."

Kaidan wisely thought for a moment how to respond. Kaidan knew Jonathan had wanted his brother to get out of that life. Kaidan would make the impossible for that to happen. "Then you'll have to continue in the Alliance, and maybe I'll give another thought."

John laughed, " you are really going to play hard to get do you?"

"I 'm hard to get I do not like adventures, and you are a very adventurous man."

"You're nice, are very different from the man I used to be. Do you have a partner? "

"Not now," Kaidan saw John, takes his hand to his cheek. "Stop. "

"I like you."

"I don't like you like that," Kaidan lied

"I do not believe you ..."

Kaidan didn't answer him, he continuous driving unable to deny himself the he likes his touch, but he couldn't forget who John was, and the truth is he didn't want to getting in trouble with someone as adventurous as John Shepard is. He already had enough with the last relationship that he had, which ended in a disaster

They arrived to the house of Hannah Shepard; John had a key, so he could open the door. It was a beautiful house. Hannah worked at the Alliance. Kaidan met her in Jonathan's funeral. Kaidan hear him call his mother, and a second later she was with them.

"John what are you doing in my house?" She asked irritated.

"Good to see you too mom," John replies sarcastically.

"The last time we spoke I told you I did not want to see you again."

Kaidan looked at Hannah without saying a word, she looked very angry, and yet her tone was bitter.

"Mom please I didn't come alone I just want to talk to you."

Hannah looked at Kaidan." I'm sorry you have to see this, but John knows I don't want to see him ever."

"Damnit mom, please-"

"No, see you cause me pain John. You make me remember my son because you are not my son, my only son died doing the right thing, but you don't know that, you only know about crime and the easy life," she said with her eyes full of tears.

"Jonathan was always your favorite, I never had a chance with you mom," John sighed, "but I just came to tell you, I'll help Commander Alenko in the same ship which my brother was Commander to finish what he started." John then looked at Kaidan. "Let's go."

"No, John let me alone with your mom."

"Kaidan."

"John, please."

"Fine, I'll be on the shutter," John said before walking out the door.

After he left Kaidan headed to Hannah. "Can you give me a few minutes of your time?" Kaidan asks her politely.

"Yes, follow me."

Kaidan followed her to the study, which looked like her office. He looked around for a moment, she had certificates on the walls in her name then he saw a picture of her with her two sons. Kaidan grabbed the picture frame. "You love John as well as you love Jonathan?"

"I do, but John disappointed me, however, Jonathan…" she could not continue.

Kaidan put the photo back, "I'm sorry for your loss, but with my help, you can get your son back. I 'm not one to get into your life, but I have a mother that I love to death. Everyone thinks I'm perfect, but I'm not-"

"So I've heard about you."

"Actually I was a restless young man, and I gave my mom a lot of headaches, with my last prank I made my mother cry many nights, but she learned to forgive me, and that made me understands what I was doing wrong, and changes my life enters to the Alliance."

"I've already given many opportunities to John. I found out that, he has issues with a dangerous gang."

"That is in the past, the thing is the now he's doing this for his brother, but after we win this threat of the reaper, John needed a reason not to come back to that life." Kaidan saw her hesitate for a moment. You could tell she was struggling with her feelings. Shepard sometimes talks to him about her. "It was what Shepard wanted. I'll make sure that he doesn't get into trouble, despite the fact that I have to admit that your son is staying with me since last week and he is driving me crazy." Kaidan saw her laugh.

"I know, my son is crazy. You don't know what you're getting into."

"Oh, I think I have a clear idea."

After that, they talked for a while. Kaidan completely forgot about John until he made his entrance into the study.

"Well, well, Kaidan I had been waiting for half an hour outside."

"I'll leave you two alone for a moment, I'll wait outside."

A while later the two came out of the house of John's mother. Kaidan could see that he was happy and that conversation with Hannah paid off. "What did you say to her? I get my mom back."

"I won't tell you let's go back to the apartment."

John put his arms around Kaidan, "You're special."

"John stops touching me," Kaidan asked him, but that the request did not sound very convincing.

"For now ..." John says.

After that things between them were much better, but John was still driving him mad. At all costs, he wanted him in bed and Kaidan was losing his willpower. That particular night Kaidan accepts his invitation to go out and have some fun. John took him to a place that he did not like it, but apparently John was accustomed to going because everybody knew him.

"John I did not like this place."

"Relax Kaidan is saved."

Kaidan saw him lighting a cigarette. "John what the hell you're doing?" Kaidan saw him stand in front of him then put his hands on the counter trapping him against it.

"Hey, pretty face you need to relax I told you, I brought you here to keep you amused for a while," John ran his finger across Kaidan's lips, "I would like to kiss your lips."

"No."

John smiled closing the distance between them, "I want to kiss you."

Kaidan put his finger in his mouth, "no!"

"I'm frustrated with you; I want you in my bed!"

"Keep dreaming Lieutenant." Kaidan said, but inside he was dying to kiss him.

John walked away laughing, "Damnit you're tough."

Kaidan grabbed the beer he was offering to him, he needed right now. He had to watch as John danced with his friends. The place is crowded, and the music was causing him headaches. After a while of being alone in the bar, he left without saying a word. When he reaches the shutter John stopped him.

"Kaidan wait."

"John go continue having fun with your friends, I'm leaving."

"I brought you, so you can have fun."

"The only one having fun is you with your friends. I'll see you in the apartment -"

"Damnit Kaidan what do you want me to do, if you reject me all the time, I'm a man I have needs, and it had been a long time since you...know I had sex."

"You are something out. Have a good time."

Kaidan leave him in the club and return to his apartment. He had drunk a lot, so he just takes off his clothes and lay down on the bed. John was free to do what he pleased. Tonight it was a reminder that John Shepard wasn't the right man for him. He remembered Shepard he would have given anything for his former commander to noticed him, but he was crazy about Liara. Gradually he was falling asleep, a few hours after he listen went John enters to his apartment, Kaidan attempt not to care, but he listen his bedroom door open.

"Kaidan -"

"Leave me alone John Shepard."

"No!"

"Dammit, you didn't have enough with the women, or the man you were tonight. Now you want to annoy me," Kaidan yelled then looked at him. John was all beaten. "What... What the hell happened to you?"

"I got in a fight because of you."

"Because of me!" Kaidan got out the bed, "Let me got get the first aid kit." Kaidan back after a few moments and one began to heal his wounds. "Okay tell me what happened."

"After you left me my mood changed. I reject someone in a bad way, and he tries to hit me, and one thing led to another," John says.

Kaidan laughed, "So you could not satisfy your needs tonight?"

"Hey, don't laugh is not funny."

"Oh it's hilarious."

"I don't know, what is happening to me with you. Kaidan, Please I want to be with you."

"NO," Kaidan finish healing the wound on his face. "Now go to bed, tomorrow we have to go to the Alliance HQ."

"Kaidan, what I have to do for you to be with me? I know you like me."

"I do, but you're not my type, you're too bold, incorrigible, plus I am your commander."

John got up rubbing his neck, "I'm just working this mission is all, Please let me stay with you tonight, and I'll be good."

Kaidan had no strength to argue with, so he allowed. He returning to his bed, and saw he begins to undress. "John-"

"Relax, I will leave my underwear on, or you want me to take it off."

"Oh Jesus Christ do whatever you want." Kaidan lay on the bed. He just listen to John mumbling something he didn't understand, then Kaidan felt John put his arm around his waist, and for a moment he had to hold his breath.

John kissed him on the cheek, "Goodnight Kaidan."

"Good night John."


End file.
